 rovocative headlines declare the demise of the family. But this defies common sense. All we need to do is look around us. Most of us live in families. They may be a traditional mom-and-pop-are-married kind of family, or a common-law family. They may be a same-sex family, or a lone-parent family. They may be a blended family or a family of friends whose level of caring for each other has evolved into a relationship that is much more than roommates. We define our own families.
Statistics Canada does not yet count every kind of family, but the latest census data tells us quite a bit about what we look like:
In 2001, there were 8,371,020 families living in Canada.
- 70% were headed by a legally married couple
- 16% were headed by lone parents
- 14% were founded on a common-law relationship
- 12% of couples with children were step/blended families (note: would also be measured within one of above statistics)
- 0.5% were estimated to be formed by a same-sex couple (note:
would also be measured within one of above statistics)
Surprised by how many families still look like the old-fashioned mom and pop model? Most of us are. There has been a trend towards increasing numbers of single-parent families, from 6% twenty years ago to 16% today. However, these numbers don't reflect that while the children may live primarily with the mother, joint custody has become ever more common and now accounts for 30% of custody cases. In these cases, the term "single" parent household is a bit of a misnomer as it does not communicate the commitment or involvement of both parents.
Over the past twenty years the number of couples living in common-law relationships has increased to 16%* from 6%, and these figures are directly linked to the older ages at which people marry.
- in 1981 women married on average at age 24 and men at 26
- in 1996 women married on average at age 27 and men at 29
Changes in legislation are opening the door for same-sex couples to choose a legal marriage as well, and according to media reports, these couples are lining up to sign on the dotted line. No doubt census data will more accurately reflect these families in the future as well.
With all the doom and gloom about divorce in the media, one would think marriage was an institution on the verge of extinction, but it clearly remains the most popular choice across the Canadian cultural spectrum.
What do we know about marriage and divorce?
The latest census data tells us that the number of divorces in Canada has actually been decreasing, but when we try to look at what that means in terms of percentages, it becomes confusing because there are so many ways to measure divorce rates. As well, the American rate of divorce, currently at 44%, is often quoted as if it were equally applicable to Canadians, but is not.
The most sensible way to measure the divorce rate is to compare the number of divorces against the number of marriages that occurred in the year that couple married. Based on that, if trends hold, the Canadian divorce rate is currently 31-36%.
The average "age" of a marriage at divorce is 13.7 years, but the anniversary with the highest rate of divorce is the fifth.
What do we know about children?
We know that:
- 58% of married couples have children living at home
- 46% of common-law couples have children living at home
- 19% of all children live with only one parent
- of these, 81% live with their mother
- of these, 19% live with their father
- estimates of same-sex households predict that 15% of households headed by lesbian couples have children and 3% of gay households have children
We also know that Canadians are having fewer children. In 1921 women gave birth to an average 3.5 children, while in 1999 the figure was 1.5 children.
Another trend in Canadian family life is that children are choosing to stay in the nest considerably longer. In 1981, 27% of 20-29 year olds were living at home, but in 2001, 41% were. Young men aged 20-24 are the largest group of adult children living at home, with 64% still in the nest.
The Family in Transition
Our own observations of the relationships in the world we live in tell us that the census forms will always be playing catch up with what is happening in the real world. But the data from Canada's most recent census in 2001 does clearly show that the family, while in transition, endures as society's oldest and most indestructible institution.
* The 16% statistic for common-law couples pertains to "couples in common- law relationships" and differs from the 14% statistic above because that statistic is measuring the number of "families based on a common-law relationship".
References
Ambert, A-M, (2002), Divorce: Facts, Causes, and Consequences.
Contemporary Family Trends, Vanier Institute of the Family
Ambert, A-M. (2003), Same-Sex Couples and Same-Sex Parent Families: Relationships, Parenting, and Issues of Marriage. Contemporary
Family Trends, Vanier Institute of the Family
Statistics Canada (2003). Families, Households, and Housing. Retrieved May 18, 2003
Statistics Canada (2003). Update on Families. Canadian Social Trends, Summer, 69, 11-13.
Statistics Canada (1999). The Crowded Nest: Young Adults at Home. Canadian Social Trends, Spring, 2-5.
Statistics Canada (2000). The Changing Face of Conjugal Relationships. Canadian Social Trends, Spring, 14-17.
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Article prepared by the 
