Aqsa Parvez in a photo from her Facebook account.

Sixteen-year-old Aqsa Parvez did not want to wear the hijab.

The Middle Eastern head covering has become the most significant icon for Islam in the West, which is unfortunate, since 90 per cent of Muslim women in this country don't wear one. By extension, they get dismissed as not being authentic Muslims.

The CBC's own Little Mosque on the Prairie plays into this stereotype by showing every prominent Muslim woman in a hijab. This superficial measurement of Muslim-ness has become so prevalent that a small but increasing number of families are pushing it on their daughters.

Aqsa, a Pakistani-Canadian, was just one of the victims of this growing obsession.

Now that Aqsa is dead, who will speak for her? Who will speak for the countless Muslim girls who lead double lives and who suffer in silence in their homes? Who will make sure they aren't abused or killed?

Who chooses?

Most Islamist men and women say that a woman chooses to wear the hijab. But, all too often, that choice is taken away from young Muslim girls.

They are being told by their parents and their imams that if they don't wear the hijab, they are no longer Muslim. This occurs even though the Koran, Islam's holy book, does not say that a woman has to cover her hair.

Take a walk in downtown Toronto, Montreal, Windsor or other cities with large Muslim populations. You will see little girls, as young as four, five and six, wearing hijabs on their way to school.

Did these little girls really make a choice to wear the hijab? Did they make a declaration to their parents that they want to be religiously pious and sexually modest? Common sense indicates that these children did not choose for themselves.

The innuendo

Meanwhile, the mullahs and Islamists are busy dismissing the idea that Aqsa's alleged murder had anything to do with religion. They are circulating rumours on-line that she had a black boyfriend, that she was sexually promiscuous, that she was a drug pusher. These are cited as reasons why her family was strict with her.

Why are they so afraid of acknowledging that obsession with a religious ritual may have been a factor? It is because they fear their own culpability in this horrible tragedy.

Before their congregations, these religious leaders tell men to control their daughters, wives and sisters.

They have brought into Canadian homes the radical Islamist notion that a man's honour is encompassed in the sexual and physical body of the women in his family, that's why they must be covered up and kept inside.

Muslim fundamentalists have made a woman's body the fighting ground for their religious wars, and it is unfortunately women who pay with their lives for the sake of their men's honour.

A wall of silence

Women's advocacy groups have played mute on the issue. When Canadian feminists are asked for their reaction to Aqsa's murder, they decline to respond and instead suggest that it would more appropriate to turn to Muslim women's groups for reaction.

Advocates are willing to speak up for all other women in Canada, from women who need cancer treatment because of radioisotope shortages to the dozens of prostitutes murdered in British Columbia, but they will not speak for Aqsa.

Even social pundits and critics are making excuses. They say that this isn't something unique to the Muslim community. They bring up examples of honour killings in Christian, Sikh and Hindu families.

Just because there are religious fanatics in every group doesn't take away the need to investigate what is happening to young Muslim women.

So far, the only ones who have spoken honestly are the young girls that attend Applewood Heights Secondary School in Mississauga.

The friends and classmates of Aqsa, who aren't concerned with political correctness, have said without hesitation that Aqsa was abused and threatened at home because of the religious fanaticism of her family. They have said she was killed because she wanted to be herself.

The rest of Canadian society could take a hint from these girls. We hesitate to condemn this behaviour because we don't want to be seen as racist. Are we going to allow cultural relativism to be the scapegoat for abuse and murder in this country?

This is not the time for discussions about cultural nuances and lowered expectations for ethnic and religious minority groups. This is the time to speak up, and say enough is enough to the religious fanatics in Canada.

If a vacuum of silence is left by the moderate people in Canada, who are the overwhelmingly majority, then that vacuum will be filled by the religious extremists on one side, who will make excuses for these actions; and by intolerant racists on the other, who will say religious minorities are poisoning this country.

Canadians, Muslim and non-Muslim, must say that while this country's greatest pride is its diversity, multiculturalism and acceptance, there are certain beliefs and laws that are inherently Canadian and that must be respected.

We have to say loudly that a woman is free to cover her body as she chooses. She is free to wear her hair how she likes. That at least in this country, she is free, no matter how you interpret your religion.

Letters

The brutal killing of the young Aqsa is a tragedy that has been over simplified by Ms. Fatah who presents a simple reason, the hijab/dress code, for her murder. An over simplified answer to a more complex issue namely the breakdown of the family unit.

The fact of the matter is that violence in general and, violence against women and children in particular, needs to be tackled at a grassroots level. Violence is a sign of the breakdown of the elementary component of society, the family.

Ms. Fatah's veiled attack on the Islamic Hijab as a reason for violence has spawned comments such as the banning of the headgear a la France.Will banning the headscarf end violence against women? It doesn't help when we generalize for the purpose of catering to an instant gratification (a simple reason to a complex problem) society and Islam bashing.

Lets work as a community to tackle this disease and put an end to violence.

– Mahmood Ahmad | Etobicoke, Ontario

Some of the comments on the case of Asqa Parvez allude to the fact of other religions in Canada having special codes of conduct, dress, etc, for women (and for men too?) and somehow this excuses harrassing women for not wearing hijab or justifies why we should accept it.

Well, many Christian churches have a CUSTOM that women should not enter a church unless their head is covered, however, these faiths keep the custom confined to their religious practice, that is, they respect the fact that this is CANADA, where there is no law that proscribes how women should dress, unlike an islamic theocracy like Iran where ALL women must wear "covering" of a certain kind, at risk of arrest if they do not.

Why is it that in countries where Islamic Law is the government, even "unbelievers", that is, women who are not converts to Islam, must also "cover"? I submit that Asqa's death had everything to do with the religious fanaticism around hijab. If not for that, she would be alive today. Some other comments in this article also allude that a woman must "earn" the right to wear hijab. Ha ha ha, i recall as a punky youth on the streets of Vancouver, being told I had to "earn" the right to wear the colours and symbols of a gang.

In my opinion this idea of "earning" the right to show your piety by wearing a head scarf has the same kind of hubris that the street mentality has.

– Eva | Gulf islands, B.C.

Miss Fatah's article from beginning to end is just a fact less writing and does not really make sense at all....She does not present facts to support her argument/writing.

Miss Fatah says, "They are being told by their parents and their imams that if they don't wear the hijab, they are no longer Muslim. This occurs even though the Koran, Islam's holy book, does not say that a woman has to cover her hair.

Take a walk in downtown Toronto, Montreal, Windsor or other cities with large Muslim populations. You will see little girls, as young as four, five and six, wearing hijabs on their way to school. Did these little girls really make a choice to wear the hijab? Did they make a declaration to their parents that they want to be religiously pious and sexually modest? Common sense indicates that these children did not choose for themselves. "

Now Miss Fatah, NO you are dead wrong here. Never an imam would tell you such a thing. Not wearing the Hijab does not make you a non muslim. Where did you get this from please tell us? When I started wearing Hijab it was totally my own choice. No one in my family forced me. I have cousins who do not wear Hijab and no one forces them or tells them if they do not wear it, they are no longer a muslim.

Therefore, Miss Fatah, you are insulting those women who wear hijab by saying that they are forced to wear it and that it is not their own choice. It is so disrespectful and ignorant. I suggest you need to study more and bring facts to support what you say.

– Zohra | Toronto

I think Natasha's outrage over Aqsa's murder is right and justified. It's about time the muslim women realize that they have certain inalienable rights to freedom and life. They are not created to be subservient to the men in their family or society,but as equal partners in life.

The Democratic governments should do their part in protecting the lives and liberties of all it's population,without fearing consequences from the religious right.

– Savita Murching | Seattle,WA

I am disappointed by Miss Fatah's one sided perspective and her employment of the unfortunate death of Aqsa Parvez as an instrument to distance herself from the rest of the "bad muslims" (implication).

As a muslim who is "non traditional," I do understand the pressure one feels to distance oneself from muslims who are hardliners. It is important to remember however, that if one is to be solution focussed then we need to figure out the real reasons behind such horrific occurences; and most of the times there is more than one reason.

There are many religious people in this world, however the outward manifestation in terms of violence in enforcing it, is more related to intrinsic personality characteristics of the individual. We do need to focus on that as opposed to just jumping on one familiar band wagon, in essence diminishing the individual culpability of her father while blaming in its entirety a religion.

As well, we need to recognize the impact of cultural influences (collectivistic cultural attitudes Vs individualistic cultural attitudes) rather than purely religious beliefs. For example, in collectivistic cultures such as in India, Asia or the Middle East, various different religions exist together, yet all are governed by common cultural mores of acceptable behaviour/morality, indicating more significant cultural rather than religious influences.

It is unfair to ignore presentation of these other facets which regulate social behaviour. And inadvertently Ms Fatah might isolate more liberal but "thoughtful" consumers of the news.

– Naheed

Thank you, Natasha Fatah, for your breath of fresh air. I believe that the reason why "feminist" groups are loathe to comment on this misogynistic act is that they are buying into the condescending notion "it (hijab) is a symbol of modesty and religious conviction", which to me seems to underscore some kind of "holier than thou" idea...and the "feminists" are afraid of the withering condescenscion of academic women who happen to wear this symbol, which helps to bolster their projected sense of superiority over other women.

I have read that this symbol is supposed to be liberating to women who wear it...well, in fact, let's get real, if hijab was truly liberating, the men would never permit women to wear it, but would keep it for themselves. Now there's a feminist perspective.

Yes, I applaud any Canadian journalist like Natasha who has the guts to speak out against these medieval traditions...and, as to the slanders about Asqa (she was a drug dealer, promiscuous and so on) even if she was doing any of these things, since when in Canada are these capital crimes?

When people expect to be excused for killing someone because "honour" has been sullied, it's tantamount to asking to have capital punishment for these social problems. Good for you Natasha.

– Eva | Gulf Islands, BC

Natasha Fatah is totaly on a wrong page here. This is not about Islam or Hijab. I think she wrote with out homework. The Social worker involved in the case had provided some details. It is not about hijab, Aqsa stoped wearing hijab almost 4 months ago. Her elder sister is not observing hijab as well. Aqsa has been out of school for no reason and her dad was called to the office. He was a loving father. It is result of some heated situational argument.

I invite muslims and non-muslims alike to read about Islam with open hearts anyone who will do so with sincere heart will find light and will be successful in both worlds.

– Ejaz Ahmad | Winnipeg

Thank you Natasha: Aqsa is another sad example of how much pressure new Canadians will face in trying to marry their old world upbringing with Western culture. Hopefully we won't see too many examples of fathers harming their daughters but incidents of this nature likely will continue until people coming to this country realise that they can't have it both ways.

If they come here, they should come here and think of Canada as home and this means accepting the west for what it has become. There is a very distinct break between the majority of average Western society and faith based religion here. I'm sorry that this is difficult for some to accept but it is fact.

I feel terrible for Aqsa and how short her life was when it seems that she wanted the same thing that I do, which is to live within the boundaries of what Canada is supposed to be and nothing more. She deserved better, she was trying to be what Canada is, an amalgam of varying cultural influences on it's way to becoming a hybrid which hopefully represents the best of all that contribute to it. We have a long way to go.

– Andy Northrup | Edmonton

Natasha's storey on Aqsa Pervez's death has only little element of truth. Sad truth is that a younge woman is dead and people like Natasha are bent on making a cheap political scandal out of it.

If her statics are true then 90% of women not wearing the Hijab are already speaking for themselve without her help. And if it is true that 10% are wearing the hijab, they are not doing so in fear of thier men folk. Many of these women are Scientist, lawyers, physicians, muslim leaders and certainly more enlightened and capable of speaking for themselve and perhaps for Aqsa. But they are not so presumptious! Many of these wore Hijab as little girl and many started wearing as adult.

Please leave Aqsa alone and let us appreciate her life and mourn her death. Allow us to understand and relate to our lives the impact of Aqsa's death. We certainly could do without your venomous comments.

– Nasir Ali

Just a few points:

1) Aqsa was killed 'cuz she was a girl and male power over women is exercised routinely in some parts of the world (and blamed on religion or culture). When was the last time we heard about a son being killed for not growing a beard, not covering his head (with whatever is considered appropriate be that a turcan. a head wrap or a tiny jewish cap), or not wearing pants long enuf?

2. Aqsa might have been any girl who just didn't want to conform.

3. Immigrant parents with poor Eng skills are not aware of how to deal with rebelliuos children in Csnada's society. They came here to make money and dream of going back as soon as they can buy that little business or piece of land ... (I know, I'm an immigrant myself and an ESL instructor so I hear it all the time). This type of families did not immigrate to Canada to 'become Canadian' and embrace Canadian values (though violence agaisnt women seems to widespread here too).

4. Honour killings are common among many ethnic groups: remember the Indian girl who was killed by her own mother & uncle who paid for her excution sytle death? what about the Somali girl that was sent home in July and ended up in jail in august never to be heard of again? CBC run an article/show for a few days and then she was forgotten - is she dead?

I guess males think there's no need to stop abusing women on behalf of keeping their family honour safe .

– Lia Fernandez Arriaran | Toronto

Religious fanaticism, as we see, can bring an otherwise unbalanced person to murder. At the same time, religion practiced with balance can bring out the best in someone who is otherwise a good person. The outcome depends on the person, their particular religion, and how it is taught.

That's why it is very important to eliminate all traces of hurtful interpretations from all religious teaching. Religious leaders should know that by inciting hatred, they can easily commit murder by proxy. If they think they can love God by spreading hate, they are delusional.

– Matthew Morycinski | Vancouver

As an expatriate Canadian I am horrified that no one is talking about the need absolutely to forbid the wearing of the hijab or any other gendered covering in public schools.

Fully adult Muslim women may be considered able to choose this demeaning attire (tho' I am not at all sympathetic to them and believe that employers should be able to exclude them from any public place of employment), but there is no question but that the public schools, in permitting such attire made it possible for Aqsa's father to believe he had some right to insist on her obeying his primitive rules.

People who choose to demean and diminish women because of their 'cultural traditions' or perverse 'religious beliefs' have no place in Canada or any civilised country. Let them choose not to come to Canada.

– Alan G. Arthur | Mount Pleasant, SC

I have to disagree with Ms. Fatah article.

First of all, all of human beings being canadian or not, being muslim or not, must condemn the killing of Aqsa Parvez. Ironically, this tragedy can be blamed on the lack of applying the guidance of Islam.

Islam does not allow violence and anger, let alone killing to be used to force people to follow it's rules ( Yes, wearing the hijab is a religious obligation according to the vast majority of muslim scholars. Ms. Fatah needs to check her facts before writing it up ).

If we learn and follow the example of the prophet Muhammad ( may the peace and blessing be upon him ), we'll see that the best way to encourage someone to do the right thing is by being kind and respectful and showing love and care to that person and advice him/her nicely.

The problem is not with the hijab or Islam, the problem is with human wickedness.

– Younes L. | Montreal

Natasha Fatah's opinion piece here is excellent, and a women's advocate, I support her point entirely.

It is one thing for an adult Muslim woman to choose to wear the hijab. I support women freely being able to choose to wear anything they like. But for any faith to be true and legitimate, then the elements of that faith have to be practised gladly and freely and without fear.

When a young woman is being told that by not wearing the hijab she is somehow no longer a good Muslim, or that she hurting her family by refusing to wear one, then it is no longer a "choice." It is especially not a choice if she being threated or abused in any way or threatened with loss of family connection by choosing not to wear one.

Having said all of this, I must take pains to point out that there are many other cultures and faiths were similar restrictions apply. Think of the Old Order Mennonite or Amish communities, for example. In some of these communities, if you are a part of that community and then refuse to follow their ways, you can be expelled or excommunicated, or subjected to "shunning" practices.

There are also many other cultures where the "old world ways" clash with North American society. My traditional European parents, for example, did not allow dating without supervision in high school. Nevertheless, I was lucky, because when I rebelled, my parents were wise enough to not cut me off from my family. They were disappointed and upset at times, yes. But I was never hit, or killed, for my rebellion and wanting to be "like the other kids." And eventually, as I grew older, I realized that although my parents had restrictions that were severe ( and I would certainly never impose those restrictions on a daughter of my own) my parents were nevertheless well-meaning and loving and I grew to appreciate them and my culture more as I grew older.

Sadly, this might have been true for this girl as well. The imams in the mosques would be well advised to remind parents of this fact: Children grow up, and what happens in the here and now, is not necessarily the path they will choose later. If this girl had been allowed to grow up and to explore (within some limits) the Western society's teenagehood, there may have been a point when she may have embraced more freely certain elements of her culture and her faith freely.

But she wasn't given that choice or that opportunity. So we will never know.

– Windy | Kitchener, ON

The article by Natasha Fatah is an irresponsible act by a person who considers herself well educated and thinks that she has the right to jump on conclusions without any solid evidence. Neither Islam tells to kill neither it is mentioned in Quran.

Murder of Aqsa Parvez is very sad and should not have happened ( May she rest in Peace ), however it is an act of a Satanic father who is an individual with no moral values, and no knowledge about religion, as Islam does not allow any Muslim to take any life and it is considerd has a major sin.

This murder is given a lot of attention because media has always been looking for any minute reason to nail Islam down. It has happened in past in other societies where father rapes and kills her daughter and media considers it just a murder and they don't elaborate on religion, however when a muslim name is involved media stands on its toes to embrace the situation as a chance to give a bad name to Islam and muslims.

Whatever happened is very sad and a poor life is taken by a devil-dad, still it would be too early to jump on conclusions as miss Natasha Fatah did. We all should pray for Aqsa's soul and May she rest in Peace, Amen

– Shahzada M | Hamilton

Bravo, Natasha, for removing the gag of political correctness and speaking out for Asqa. We have all seen the disclaimers that there exist "honor" (sic) killings and other undesirable consequences for going against other faiths.

I have indeed witnessed negative reactions by families of other faiths such as disowning for homosexuality, etc. Notice that, shameful as they are, these tend to be less severe than the abuse and honour killings encountered in Asqua's case. The media is understandably using this disclaimer about other faiths, but this leads to a failure to point a finger even perhaps when it needs to be pointed.

You alone have had the courage to do this. Perhaps though your focus is too heavy on the hijab itself and missing a bigger picture. The murder is still under investigation but let me conjecture and explore that the murder was mostly due to a reaction to Asqa wanting to leave Islam altogether.

There exists dangerous precedent and problematic teachings in Islam that could easily lead to her father's fatal discipline. One of the most seemingly problematic phrases of all, and the most un-Canadian, is found in the hadith and goes something like "The Prophet said,'If a Muslim discards his religion, kill him'." Of course there is always context, but the unnerving take home message has been interpreted by many from several different sources: apostasy should be punished by death.

I can't help but wonder if this was the line of reasoning going through the mind of Asqa's father as he strangled the life out of her. In Canada, this can be interpreted in no other way than that the victim is killed for their (lack of) religious beliefs, a hate crime.

Perhaps the Muslim community in Canada ought to help resolve this to the satisfaction of all Canadians. It could be argued that Christianity and Judaism have already made great strides in allowing followers the freedom to leave but Islam lags far behind.

How will they teach parents in the community to accept the reality that some of their children, as Canadians , may convert to a different faith or reject religion altogether? How will they come to tolerate the Canadian right to apostasy in their children who chose it so that no one takes the above interpretation of justice to its chilling conclusion?

– Nicholas Miller | Waterloo. On

This is a shameful incident for all those societies that encourage these types of liabilities.Aqsa was muslim but before that she was a human being she had the right to live her life in her own way.

This incident is not only related with muslim culture the only fact that she was killed was not obeying her father .Nothing is so big matter for which a person should be killed.

– Naz | Mississauga

I am just sick and tired of people associating every incident with Islam and blaming the religion. This incident is about an argument between a young girl and her crazy father. That's it.

There are hundreads of stories all over the world where crazy parents kill their children because they disobey them. Why is religion not mentioned there? Just the fact that we are discussing this story itself shows how biased people are when it comes to Islam.

People expect Muslims to be perfect citizens with no family problems or issues and if any does arise,then of course Islam is to be blamed for it. I think it is a shame people think this way.

– Ahmad | Toronto

Well written article and the last paragraph pretty much summarized thoughts of the majority of Canadians and most of forward thinking Muslims in this country. However, when I re-read the article, I can't help thinking of certain points made.

"This occurs even though the Koran, Islam's holy book, does not say that a woman has to cover her hair." I believe that not correct. It does say that women must cover their hair and dress modestly. BUT, it also says that its not to be forced on anyone becuase 1) One who wears the head cover forcibly dont believe in it and hence defeats the purpose and 2) Its more like an earned previlege rather than a forced one. Only those who know enough to believe in it could wear that.

Anyways, Islam in its true essnese never forced anything on anyone, like all the major religions. Its something you choose yourself.

"You will see little girls, as young as four, five and six, wearing hijabs on their way to school. Did these little girls really make a choice to wear the hijab? Did they make a declaration to their parents that they want to be religiously pious and sexually modest?"

Now, I could agree with your point if that was the only thing we make them do without they choosing for themselves. When one of this girl will tell her dad that she want to smoke becuase she think its cool, would tell her not to or would you just let her do that? We make our kids do many things against their wishes because we think its for their best interest.

Its against their wishes because they have't attained the wisdom to understand the reasoning behind it. But please note that this wouldnt apply in Aqsa's case because she was old enough to understand the reasoning behind her dad's point and she should have given the freedom to choose. My point here is just on the point Fatah made here.

What I would like to say is to look at this very unfortunate incident as a criminal act and treat it as its one. So far I have seen many use this as a propaganda weapon against the Muslim population here. Attention should be focussed on investigating this criminal incident to the fullest extent possible and if the father is found guilty should be given the strictest possible punishment. Please do not use this an opportunity to propogate notions that Hijab is a social evil and should be banned. Hijab is a religious entity, let it remain so.

"We have to say loudly that a woman is free to cover her body as she chooses. She is free to wear her hair how she likes. That at least in this country, she is free, no matter how you interpret your religion."

Well said. This is exactly the point people from every religion and every background should understand. You can't force religion on anyone. People should understand that wearing a hijab is strictly a personal choice. But has the author ever looked at the cases of women being attacked because they chose to wear a hijab? Wouldnt you think this is something that you should also look at? Those who commit the crime is not that different from Aqsa's father - if he is found guilty of committing this crime. Wouldnt you agree?

– B J Kidd | Milton, ON

While I agree with much of what Ms. Fatah is saying, I don't think we should go as far as inventing facts. There's no need to make speculations on the origins of hijab, or the percentage of women who wear it (I'm interested in the source of these findings).

The fact is that there is absolutely no moral justification for what happened to Aqsa either in Canadian or Islamic Law. A derogatory survey of the author's view of hijab is completely irrelevant and only opens the debate up to issues that could never furnish any justification for what happened one way or another.

Instead of fear mongering and igniting divisive debates on hijab in the Muslim community, why give even the slightest credibility to to any of these ridiculous "justifications" by condemning what happened in one voice, and in the strongest terms? As a hijab-wearing law student, if the story the media has painted so far is true, I certainly hope the charge is first degree murder.

– Tenan Razik | Toronto

I agree with Aayla. I find it interesting that people are so ready to jump to conclusions that it was the disagreement between her and her parents regarding religion, that she led to her murder.

Many kids rebell against their parents on numerous issues, but the fact that there is discord doesn't necessarily mean that it would lead to death. There's no excuse for what happened to her - and whatever the reason, I hope the murderer is punished to the full extent of the law.

In the meantime, I'd ask the media and Canadians to not jump to conclusions.

– L. Reza | Ottawa

Ms Fatah offers up something that is all too often missing in discussions of religious matters - Reason. The article is not focused on judgments of right or wrong. It makes reasonable observations and then asks relevant follow-up questions. What I believe still stands as the foundation of good journalism.

And from reading the other comments, the article does illuminate some consensus: This tragic situation should not have played out as it did. Like countless others before it. As a society we should not cower in the shadows of fear, ignorance, political correctness and the many other hindrances, which prevent social progress. Communication should be open, respectful and above all, founded in reason.

Articles like this inspire such interactions and can lead to more bridges and less divides.

Let us ALL be the voice of Aqsa and keep asking questions.

– S. Bureau | Cape Breton

Natasha has missed an important point in her analysis "who will speak for Aqsa Parvez?" My point deals with being young, teen age, peer pressure, and lack of understanding on parents part, especially parents from ethnic communities.

I was born and raised in a different culture and I am a father of three teenage boys. It has been a challenge to balance my life in the western culture and then having to give best values of the both cultures to my kids. The problem is that we are under estimating youth and are afraid that they may make some mistakes that will not only hurt them personally but also hurt the family in terms of community and social standing.

Our youth are under tremendous pressure and so are we as parents who are trying our best to survive both finacially and culturally. We do so much for our kids that we start to have expectations on them for us and for following our traditions. Any deviation from these expectations is often seen as a threat to our existance as a family and our standing in the community. We need to educate families, more so ethnic families, in effectively dealing with our kids specially in the teen age years of their lives. It is not a matter of being a Muslim or parent from any other religion or even wearing a Hijab or not, it is a matter of understanding the pressures our kids are growing with.

It is a matter of teaching the kids best human values and then letting them decide what they want to follow. Instead of preaching politics in relegious palces whether they are Churches, Mosques, Temples, Gurdwara's, we need to have a dialogue about the challenges faced by our youth and families. In these relegios palces including mine, focus is exclusively on adults and challenges facing our religion or culture. We take our kids for granted and think that they will automatically follow us which is not the case as kids have their own needs and pressures. They need freedom to establish their own identity.

So, lets not blame individual family, culture or religion. We can all learn from the tragic death of Aqsa Parvez and support our kids and families through dialogue and education. Using her death for anything else will be an injustice to Aqsa. Regards!

– J Manjit Singh | Sarnia, On

I commend Ms Fatah for her courageous stand on the subject of Parvez Aqsa's horrible death. Yes, it is about intergenerational conflict, domestic violence and clash of cultures but it is also about how religious fundamentalism blinds people-including a father who has a moral obligation to guarantee his daughter's safety.

I am glad that she has seen fit to single out Little Mosque on the Prairie and its subliminal message about the hijab and Islam.

– Anu bose | Ottawa

Firstly, as it has been reported countless times, Aqusa was given the choice of weather or not she wanted to wear a hijab or not- she was not forced. She was completely rebellious, ran away from home for 5 days and had her parents sick with worry- that's what was the instigation.

Just because this occurred in a Muslim family, does not automatically make it a religious influence, or even a cultural one. Clearly the family had many more, deeply ingrained issues. If this had taken place, in for example a caucasian family, what then would you say? That the father was a nutcase, and it'd be just another statistic.

There was no regard towards the hijab, so I ask, why do is itbeind made as if was so? Why do you just pick up on one thing, and continuously spread it throughout the world, giving the public such a bad impression of Muslims?

You know the true story, so why say it's a Hijab issue? Yes I know that hatered against Islam sells, but then what does that make you?

– Sara | Vaughan,Ont

I cannot believe the response from Aayla. This is exactly the kind of problem the writer is talking about. The girl told her friends that she didn't want to wear the hijab. The friends said she didn't want to wear the hijab.

There is documentation that the father beat her because she wasn't traditionally Muslim enough. How much more evidence do you need? You're right we don't know all the details yet, and Natasha is not saying that the father is guilty. She is talking about a bigger problem about forcing religion on people.

Why are you looking for excuses?

– Alejandra Luna | Montreal

Ms. Fatah is to be commended for forcefully stating social and personal reality for many. I agree that we need to look through political correctness and the guise of multi-culturalism to correct behavior which wrongfully affects, controls and impedes the lives of many in Canadian society.

Individual Canadains should be able to define themselves, and forces which wrongfully impede this, contrary to the values of Canadian society and the Charter, should be actively dealt with by the state and exposed by the media.

– S.R. Ball | Toronto

Aqsa Parvez was not killed because her family is Muslim; she was killed because her family is religious. Her father and his ilk, given the choice between killing God and killing his daughter, obediently kills the daughter. Why? Because he loves God more than Aqsa.

Note that Muhammad Parvez has never met God but simply assumes he exist because that's what his daddy said. In other words, he has short-circuited his intellect - his ability to think clearly.

We have several billion people on this planet that think the same way. Things are not going to get any better anytime soon for the Aqsas of this world.

Give it a try people: No one has ever been proven to have encountered God in any form - ever. Therefore he doesn't exist or is irrelevant. Now, you can give your God-given hatred a rest and carry on with exploring this wonderful world.

– Murray Hill | Richmond, BC

I find the speculation in this article disturbing. It is an excuse to emotionally point the finger at women's advocacy groups who will not "speak up" for this victim. At the time of this writing, there is a publication ban on details of the case. How does the author of this article "know" that it was Aqsa Parvez' refusal to wear hijab that led to her death?

I think that most of us, given the climate of fear and suspicion against Muslims in this country, are right to refrain from knee-jerk reaction until we know more about what happened in this family.

This tragedy appears to be about family violence and that is all that we can currently say with confidence. Family violence and abuse are never ever ok or acceptable... but family violence and abuse are not confined to Muslim cultures alone.

I think what has happened to this poor young woman is terrible. I am not going to further violate her by using her death to rain down self-righteous vitriol.

– Aalya Ahmad | Gatineau, QC

Thank you for this excellent article. I am a Canadian expatriate who is deeply disturbed by the reaction to this young woman's murder and by the CBC's other coverage of it: it is significant that on the evening news, the only feedback on this site that was quoted was from those who insisted that the incident had nothing to do with Islam. As usual, the story was used to beat up on Canadians for their supposed racism and intolerance.

However, it is also a mistake to differentiate between "radical" and "moderate" Islam. You can only be a "moderate" Muslim (or Christian or Jew, for that matter) if you choose to ignore parts of the so-called holy books, which are full of hatred and exhortations to smite the unbeliever.

It's time all of us started living in the 21st century and stopped letting our lives be guided by books written in an age of ignorance. Then maybe we can all start treating one another with respect.

– Peter | Bellevue WA

In every society, culture and religion parents have right to choose what they think is best for their young kids both morally and physically.This is their social and moral obligation. I don't see why writer have problem with that.

Second. Most of the Muslim feel dependent on the interpretation of the Holy Qur'an provided by other equally illiterate peoples and most of the time consider their cultural and tribal tradition as religious obligations. Covering the face or body is not only considered "Religious" obligation in Islam but also in Christianity, Hinduism and other religions from centuries.

The Case of Aqsa is not as simple as “not wearing Hijab” (as some commentator suggested), It is a cultural phenomenon in some part of Indo-Pak sub-continent where crossing the limits of cultural traditions justifies “honor” Killing. Recall the similar incident happen with indo-Canadian Sikh girl from BC (Jaswinder Kaur) who was killed just because she was in love outside her cult and ready to get marry. She wasn’t “teen” or Muslim.

Muslims should stop feeling "guily by association"for every crime committed by other ill minded Muslims. The case of Aqsa should be condemned by all Canadians including Muslim Canadians.

– Jawed Memon | Ottawa

Thank you for having the courage to write this viewpoint. When murder is reported, discussed and dismissed as just something that happens;it is a dangerous social attitude, especially when religious fanaticsm is accepted as "normal".

I agree, that there IS an ongoing, overt and subtle political/cultural push for this image of the Muslim woman with a covered head. This has to cease and desist. The media has major responsibility in this push through its practices in photography, online, in print and on air.

The culture that is responsible for this is the culture of fear and control - in and out of homes. Reporting that is merely the parroting of "politically correct" ideas and images, gives dead information. Where is journalism - that drive to probe and look at human issues with clarity, objectivity etc?

– Sali | Toronto

I could not agree more with you Natasha, why is it that Women's advocacy groups are not responding to Aqsa's murder? This is NOT soley a Muslim issue.

As a Canadian more so than as an Indian-Hindu, I see this murder, and all such murders, as a crime against ALL women. Making this an issue about one community is just not enough.

– Angela Misri | Toronto

This is a excellent article and thank you for writing it. Muslims are so busy being defensive about every little thing, they cannot admit when there actually is a problem in the community. Hopefully articles like this will help.

– Alia Khan | Windsor, Ontario

Your article is nicely stated.

The fact remains that Aqsa was murdered for not obeying her fathers rules. There is no excuse no matter what her religion is.

Millions of teenagers disobey their parents everyday, they don't die for it. This man, or shall I say monstter killed her for just that reason. It's sickening.

– Bessie | Markham, Ont.

Thank you very much for speaking up the way you did, and for your exceptional insight into this story.

It's refreshing to see someone with a critical and well-rounded view of the situation. It's a horrible double edged blade when people are too scared to speak out for fear of being branded as a racist, and the extremists on either end of the spectrum get to trample over the Canadian ideal of freedom.

– Rich | Victoria